Hyperblogic

Come. On.

2011-03-23T21:18:00.004-04:00

As soon as winter began hitting New York, I got a lot of questions about the weather. Most of my friends are from the South and were about to experience their first Northern winter. I had 18 of them under my belt.

The two things I always said were 1)Yes, the temperature may hit zero, but once you get below 20 its really all the same. 2) Yes, snow in December, January and February is annoying BUT JUST WAIT until March. In March, you get all these teases. Like "oh, its 70 degrees and warm today" or "oh, it is lighter out later" or "oh, it is officially Spring." And then you get this. March 23rd, it is snowing outside, and it will probably snow again tomorrow.

So basically, this is the horrible feeling I have been warning people about for months.

Also, I think I am moving to California.

And Now Boston

2011-03-13T22:35:00.003-04:00

Washington DC

2011-02-16T22:52:00.005-05:00

I went on a mini vaca! To DC! Saw all my friendz!

(This post is mostly for you Mom)

Bike taxes.

2011-01-27T22:08:00.003-05:00

When this commercial comes on during an episode of 30 Rock...

...I feel like my demographic is being violated.

I guess the fact that I'm blogging about it makes it worse.

Disney.

2011-01-26T23:27:00.005-05:00

Rotten Tomatoes ranked all 50 Disney animated films. 2 major surprises on this list:

1. Robin Hood was ranked at 46. That is behind such gems as "Treasure Island" and "Home on the Range."

2. Bolt was ranked at 11. I didn't see this. I wasn't aware that anyone did.

Kanye West Tweets

2011-01-04T19:56:00.002-05:00

I am at the point at work where in my down time I feel comfortable scrolling through my Tumblr feed, but I am still not at a point where I would watch videos.

Which is why today was torture. I saw this video posted in probably three places, and two separate people pointed it out to me on Facebook. But here we are. Worth the wait.

Also, once, I served Josh Groban coffee and a pain de raisin. And, yes, he was wearing those hipster glasses in real life and also designer jeans. It was the designer jeans that convinced me it was him. Only celebrities wear designer jeans. At least ugly designer jeans.

Snow.

2010-12-28T23:50:00.003-05:00

You know the rumors about how they haven't plowed a bunch of streets in the outer boroughs?

All true.

Oh and also this photo of Williamsburg.

(via Gothamist)

Seasons Greetings.

2010-12-23T22:12:00.003-05:00

Season's Greetings from E.T. and Me! (circa 1992)

Christmas American Life.

2010-12-23T16:52:00.003-05:00

This week's This American Life is called "Comedians of Christmas." Its just comedians telling stories about Christmas, and its just great. Poignant and fun stories, instant holiday classic for me. Go listen! While you are driving a 45 minute trip in 2 and a half hours! (I assume thats what everyone is doing this holiday season?)

Fight.

2010-12-09T20:20:00.003-05:00

This morning, while I was walking to work, I was pondering the blurb I saw about a short film entitled "Fight For Your Right Revisited," written and directed by Adam Yauch (MCA). At this point the only thought I had about it was that I wanted to see it. Then I got to work, read the five emails I got in the middle of the night because other people work crazy hours, opened up my Tumblr and saw THIS.

This would be a photo of Seth Rogen, Elijah Wood, and Danny McBride as Mike D, AdRock, and MCA (respectively). Now I the only thought I have (period) is how much I want to see this movie.

Amazing.

Today.

2010-12-03T23:10:00.002-05:00

Clearly The Today Show takes the violence in Korea VERY seriously. Clearly they want to show that this is a real problem for real people. Clearly.

Also clearly their anchors take it seriously too. (re: "Gotta get another gig")

Life Update again.

2010-11-10T18:54:00.003-05:00

Whoops. I forgot to tell you. I have another new job. This one is full time, regular hours, and much more adult. I work for a small business (which will remain nameless because I got in trouble at my last job for blogging it, lesson learned) in the shipping department. Mostly this means yelling at UPS all day and printing out shipping labels. It works for me for now, and it is surely allowing me time to immerse myself in the Brooklyn culture.

And by Brooklyn culture I mean brunches. As many as possible. Its what they do here.

Turkey Cake.

2010-11-09T22:00:00.000-05:00

Oh hey friends, lets have a Thanksgiving party and eat this cake.

Oh wait I forgot, we can't because you are all veggie heads.

Sunday.

2010-11-08T20:17:00.006-05:00

Sundays are the best days. This Sunday was the NY marathon, which ran right through our neighborhood, so we went down and to cheer on the runners as they ran 26 miles. 26 MILES.

Then I went out for brunch and ate this pile of food. I mean, someone had to.

Really?

2010-11-02T23:27:00.003-04:00

George W. Bush says that Kanye's Katrina dis was the worst moment of his presidency. This is the stuff "Really!?! With Seth & Amy" was made for.

Vote.

2010-11-01T22:36:00.001-04:00

First, go to here. Then go to there!

Hat.

2010-10-24T20:48:00.004-04:00

My friend recently called upon my skillz to recreate a hat she saw on the Anthropologie website. This hat:

This hat was $48.00. Thats crazy! Here is the hat I made:

I realize they aren't exactly the same (Mines all crochet, there's is a mix of knit and crochet. Sorry to get technical). I'm pretty proud of it. I love saving money, for me or other people.

Autumn.

2010-10-10T01:01:00.004-04:00

IT IS FINALLY FALL.

I am really excited about this.

Here is a picture of Central Park in the fall.

Oh and also a little bit of a dead woman.

The Social Network.

2010-10-05T10:47:00.003-04:00

Pretty much everything that could possibly be said about The Social Network has been said. I very much enjoyed it, but in addition to enjoying the movie I am also fascinated by the information about Facebook and Mark Zuckerberg that is accompanying the release of the movie.

Instead of adding to this conversation, I am just going to share with you my favorite bit from it. The New Yorker wrote an nice, long piece about Zuckerberg which included this section. I personally that of all of the things that have tried to define Zuckerberg's character, this selection is what gives me the most honest and interesting insight.

"As it happens, Sorkin’s “The West Wing” is one of Zuckerberg’s favorite television shows. He discovered it while on a trip to Spain with Chan, whom he has been dating, with a brief interruption, since 2003. In Madrid, they both got sick, and ended up watching the first season of the show in bed. In a Spanish department store, they bought DVDs of the six other seasons and eventually watched them all. Zuckerberg said that he liked the authenticity of the series—the way it captured the truth, at least as friends of his described it, of working in Washington.

I told Sorkin that his TV series was one of Zuckerberg’s favorites. He paused. “I wish you hadn’t told me that,” he said finally. When I asked Sorkin to guess the episode that Zuckerberg liked best, he said, “The Lemon-Lyman episode”—the one in Season Three where Josh Lyman, the deputy chief of staff, played by Bradley Whitford, discovers that he has a following on an online message board and unwisely interacts with its members.

Actually, Zuckerberg’s favorite episode, he told me, was “Two Cathedrals,” at the end of Season Two, in which Martin Sheen, who plays President Josiah Bartlet, grieves at the death of his longtime secretary and, after disclosing that he has multiple sclerosis, ponders whether he should seek reëlection. He is inside the National Cathedral and orders that it be temporarily sealed. He curses God in Latin and lights a cigarette. “It’s, like, even in journeys like Facebook, we’ve had some very serious ups and downs,” Zuckerberg said.

Zuckerberg says that many of the details he has read about the film are just wrong. (He had, for example, no interest in joining any of the final clubs.) When pressed about the movie and what it means for his public persona, he responded coolly: “I know the real story.”

A few days after we spoke, Zuckerberg changed his Facebook profile, removing “The West Wing” from his list of favorite TV shows."

Sometimes.

2010-09-19T00:36:00.002-04:00

Sometimes I think complaints about things that make me really mad, but then I realize how ridiculous it is to complain about such small things.

My most recent example is from when I was walking home about 10 minutes ago and I was reading twitter on my phone and a twitpic took at least thirty seconds to load, if not more. As it was happening I was like "Ugh, it is so annoying that it is taking so long for this twitpic to load, my life is so hard." and then my next immediate thought was "You have internet on your phone and you are walking home to the clean, safe roof over your head and you are whining about a delay in seeing a picture of a vending machine. Shut up."

Primary.

2010-09-14T23:49:00.008-04:00

It is primary day here in NYC. I have been paying more attention than usual to these races, and I am specifically curious about the race for state committee, which is decided today. I don't completely understand where state committee falls into our bureaucracy, and I definitely don't understand why each district has a male and a female representative. You can vote for one male and one female. Is this supposed to even things out? Does it work? I don't get it but anyway. This is the poster for candidate Warren Cohn.

I don't know if it is clear from this photo, but he looks CRAZY. Also, he doesn't have a real website (just a facebook fan page) or a clear platform (he is a "constant bridge builder") and he has a photo album named FUNdraiser (gross).

The other candidate:

Lincoln Restler looks like I like my politicians to look (read: dork), has a real live website explaining to me not just his platform (words I like: "transparency" and "accountability") but also what state committee actually is (someone who serves on the executive council of the county's democratic or republican party), and shook my hand twice but didn't make me stop to chat.

So I have absolutely no say in this election, and it is almost over as I type this, but when I do get around to changing my residency on my voter registration, I hope Lincoln is representing me.

(No information about the female candidates because I have seen just about zero about them. I don't even know who Warren Cohn's running mate is, and the only thing I have seen about Kate Zidar, Lincoln's running mate, is their joint posters and a brief look at her website.)

UPDATE: Lincoln won by 20 votes!

UPDATE AGAIN: This poster is still up a month and a half later. Warren is just making a mockery of himself at this point.

Adjusting.

2010-09-13T12:42:00.002-04:00

In a past life I would be here today to post a video of Kanye's performance at last nights VMAs. But I didn't see it. MILLIONS of people watched, while I watched My Boys, because TBS is for some reason the only cable channel our antenna gets us. So, my lack of embedded Kanye video is a symbolic mark of this new cableless chapter of my life. Because I have of course seen this video, but so has everyone else so it is not as exciting. This new chapter is not a bad one overall, just an adjustment we will all have to learn to live with.

Life Update.

2010-09-09T10:44:00.004-04:00

I work at a bakery now. I worked my first shift last night, and it was somewhat grueling. Mostly it was just grueling in an I-am-whiny-because-I-haven't-worked-retail-in-four-years kind of way. This is a good in between job, keeping the money flow going while I find my dream job. It is also good because I just have to try all of the things so that I can make recommendations. Like this coffee cake:

I will never go breadless again.

Overall, I am feeling pretty good about life. Got a job, got a good attitude, will keep you filled in on any other changes!

Poll.

2010-09-03T12:04:00.004-04:00

I am glad we are doing polls only on the most necessary things that are not obvious to everyone in America.

Good job New York Times. As per usual.

Time Travel.

2010-08-31T15:49:00.002-04:00

This is an amusingly off-putting photo.

Unemployed.

2010-08-31T10:16:00.003-04:00

So I don't really have a job. I have a temporary job, but it is about to end, so I don't really have a job. I have been applying to every job I feel remotely qualified for, which means applying to about 100 jobs. Rather than getting responses like "Hey! We think you may be qualified for this job, you should come in and talk to us!" I instead get responses like:

" I am also glad on the commitment in working. I have been checking my files and what i would want you to do for me next week is to run some errands out to some of the orphanage home which I do every month. The funds will be in form of Cashier check, it will be sent over to you from one of my clients and i have some list to email you once you received the funds."

AND:

" She would like to conduct an online interview with you OnSaturday, August 28, 2010 between 9:00AM -2:00 PM EST to discuss more about the Job Position of a Data Entry Clerkposition that you are yet to occupy." They then asked me to set up a Yahoo! IM account through which to conduct the interview.

SO. I am just saying, I am sick and tired.

Also, who is out there typing these emails and being like "I realize that I do not speak English, but it is perfectly reasonable for me to think that my broken English will sound like perfect American English and people will believe that I am in no way trying to scam them" WHO?

Praaaaaanked.

2010-08-24T21:10:00.005-04:00

This is a great picture of a great prank by our President of the United States.

Obama is great at pranking, just like me! He makes his friends think they are fat! One time, I pranked my friend by making her think that a totally inconsequential character in "The Princess Diaries 2: The Royal Engagement" was going to be the main love interest! Hilarious!

But seriously Obama, you are great. Keep standing up for things like religious freedom, and I'll keep thinking you are great. Deal?

Baked.

2010-08-23T19:43:00.002-04:00

Is making a trailer for a book a normal thing to do? I don't know if I'm just not hip to the book world, but I don't think it is. Anyway, there is a trailer for Baked's new cookbook. Actually there are two. I need this book. And apparently, I need a skillet.

Embarrassing story? I have Matt's autograph. My friend told him he was an inspiration to us and then asked for an autograph for me. These are my celebrities.

Ninties.

2010-08-22T21:56:00.002-04:00

So the NY Times says the "Elaine Benes Look" is coming back. The blogs of Glamour magazine may be scoffing, but I am super ok with that.

Especially if we are turning this:

Into this:

Home.

2010-07-25T21:40:00.002-04:00

I have a new place of residence.

This is our view.

More photos and info to come.

Excited!

Bully.

2010-07-19T20:55:00.006-04:00

This weekend, I wanted to go on an adventure. Well, what I really wanted to do was go on vacation, but since that was not gonna happen, I wanted to have an adventure. Chessie also wanted to go for an adventure. I thought long and hard about what to do, and eventually we settled on Sagamore Hill. That would be Teddy Roosevelt's former place of residence. It was great.

This is good ole' TR's residence.

This windmill generated power to pump water into the house.

It also provided good practice for the young gymnasts that were the Roosevelt children.

This is the sound, which Teddy could once see from his porch.

Teddy cut trees to maintain his view, but planted others so as to conserve nature.

This is me standing where Teddy accepted the nomination for Governor of New York and later, Vice President of the United States. Cool right?

This is me holding the historical home in my hands.

All in all, a good time. Perfect Sunday adventure.

Photo Essay.

2010-07-15T09:41:00.004-04:00

I have decided to share a few photographs of what my (somewhat mundane) average day is like. These are really not a lot of photos, for a few reasons: 1) I only remembered to take pics at about 2 points in my day. 2) I used my phone rather than my camera because I was embarrassed to pull out a camera and take pictures of these things alone on the train or at work 3) Some of the photos I ended up taking were pretty lame.

So here we go!

Most days, I put my train ticket on my lap, and promptly fall asleep.

As do the rest of my fellow commuters.

Then I arrive at work. Part of that is answering the phone.

Filing is also a part of it.

Then I take the train home. No sleeping this time.

And then, home. Which means lots of Netflix.

Sleepys.

2010-07-08T19:39:00.003-04:00

Every time I see this commercial, all I can think is "Wow Sleepy's Mattresses, I cannot believe you just wove a narrative out of stock footage from the 80s and 90s. Now I definitely think that your mattress is a good fit for me."

Another note on stock footage: Whenever the plot of Beverly Hills: 90210 takes us to the beach, the same clips of people playing volleyball, laying out, or strolling are played to set the scene, just in different sequences. This is something you notice when watching the episodes all in a row on DVD. And probably only then. So not that many people know about it.

Things.

2010-07-04T09:02:00.001-04:00

About a month ago, I declared that I would be getting more personal and less pop-culturey so as to keep far away friends in the know. Since then, I have done nothing even close to that. So, here are some things about my life in the two months:

I am working temporarily at the Hospital for Special Surgery, doing general office work for the surgeon my aunt works for. It is a bit stressful as he is like, the busiest doctor, but I am SO GLAD to be working at all.
I am one the quest for a full time job. Some days it seems bleak, other days I am filled with hope, and other days filled with fear. But lets be real, that is not exactly a huge change from my usual emotions.
I am very excited for my Charleston friends to move on up here so that we can start our adult lives.
I have made the transition into wearing almost solely dresses and skirts (and a romper here or there). This is weird for me, but I am adjusting.
I watch Netflix almost exclusively. I am currently in the middle of watching Dexter, Party Down, The State, and all of the Bones episodes I never saw. Soon I will probably also start Skins and Californication, because why not?

Thats all for now. I am hoping there will soon be more exciting developments to announce.

Power.

2010-06-28T23:14:00.003-04:00

So I have been giving Drake a lot of love here, but I am going to take this opportunity to return to my roots. Here is a video of Ye performing on the BET awards. He is great. This is great. Weather and mountains are great.

BET Videos

A Infinidad y Más Allá

2010-06-26T22:00:00.001-04:00

I FINALLY saw Toy Story 3 last night, and it was wonderful, even with a weeks worth of reviews hyping it up. It was funny, and sad, and great. I would say that I came away with the exact same message I did from the first one, at age 7, but now I am taking it much less literally.

And here is a fun related video:

See more funny videos and funny pictures at CollegeHumor.

Tweet Tweet

2010-06-26T13:31:00.002-04:00

This video is OK. The one thing that I really like about it is that the do-rag (correct spelling courtesy of Wikipedia) is solely a comedic prop and not something Drake would ever consider wearing in real life. He is the bestest.

2010-06-21T21:18:00.003-04:00

I'm just a little confused about why we are pretending that these people should be a part of things. Like awards shows and music videos.

Baby Otters Smiles & Co.

2010-06-19T00:04:00.003-04:00

Basically, it is dumb to think that this mess will be fixed by PR.

See more funny videos and funny pictures at CollegeHumor.

It doesn't work for pizza. It most def won't work for a giant environmental disaster.

Haha. Facebook.

2010-06-14T16:48:00.004-04:00

I have SO many words to say about the pages you can like on Facebook and the suggestions Facebook makes to me every day, but the entertainment in this one speaks for itself:

One Hand in the Air for the Big City

2010-06-13T15:57:00.007-04:00

This is just a post about how much I love New York City, and how much I love taking pictures of New York City.

Photo credit on the one above goes to my sister, Bridget.

Expect more of this as time goes on.

They Would.

2010-05-28T16:53:00.003-04:00

Vampire Weekend WOULD put out a video entitled "Holiday"

on a holiday weekend!

Vampire Weekend - New Music - More Music Videos

I love holidays. And Vampire Weekend. Happy Memorial Day Weekend!

Yes.

2010-05-27T10:15:00.003-04:00

Drake and Jay-Z on the same track? Yes. Always yes. This song has more curse words than you could ever imagine BUT there are some fun rhymes in there.

1. "I just say I wrote it for your Girlfriends, Kelsey Grammer"

Because Kelsey Grammer (former Frasier star) is the executive producer of the UPN/CW/now mostly seen on the WE network show "Girlfriends." Get it?

2. "I don't do too much bloggin', I just run the town, I don't do too much joggin'"

Haha. Jay-Z said "bloggin"

3. "Tell these ....something like Windows 7, you let them tell it they invented you"

Like the commercials! On the TV! Where the people say Windows 7 was my idea!

So yeah. Check it.

Obsolete

2010-05-21T18:09:00.004-04:00

This polo shirt is now the most pointless thing in my wardrobe. I cannot think of one single situation in which I would wear it again. The one time I wore it outside of work, everyone was like "are you coming from work?"

p.s., this is how interesting my life is now. This is what I have to blog about.

Ok, Windows 7...

2010-05-20T17:54:00.002-04:00

I have been seeing these commericals for months, where people imagine themselves to be more good looking and haha that is so funny even though they are good looking to begin with, but this one is just ridiculous.

The person he imagines is no better looking than him! I don't get it.

Announcement

2010-05-17T21:04:00.002-04:00

I would like to announce a slight change in the content of this blog. As previously announced, I have now graduated from college, which in addition to meaning that I am now a wandering nomad searching for purpose in life also means that I have moved far, far away from many of my closest friends. So, I will now be posting more personal and regular updates of the goings on in my life. Fortunately for you, I will just cover major themes and changes, not my every waking thought. Though at this point, I certainly have time for that.

Don't worry, I will continue to inundate all of my lucky readers with the most random of pop culture tidbits I find interesting. Just to prove it, here is a fun video from Chiddy Bang:

Have a lovely day.

I Graduated!

2010-05-13T13:34:00.005-04:00

I graduated from college this weekend. My mom wants to see some pictures. So here are some pictures!

Now I am moving out of my apartment and it looks like this:

This is the saddest part. Bye bye Charleston!

Things are ending

2010-04-30T00:00:00.003-04:00

Today was my last day working at the after school program I have worked at/volunteered at for the last three years. The last few days have been a bit of a flurry of work, receptions, and finals, so I didn't really have time to think "this is the end" as it was all happening. Then, as I was leaving our end of the year party, I took some time to read the graduation card all of the kids had signed for me. For the most part, they had written things like "We will miss you!" and "We are proud of you!" but two signatures made me laugh and remember how much I loved working there, and how much I was going to miss it.

The first takes a bit of prefacing. We have one student who recently cut off a portion of his middle finger. It completely grosses me out to think about and because his parents speak very little English I cannot give a good explanation of how it happened, but that is basically what you need to know to enjoy this. I guess that this girl thought that she was signing a card to give this boy, because this is what she wrote:

"I am so sorry you hurt your finger you rock!"

This is hilarious, mostly because I will forever have a lovely graduation card (which I will honestly keep forever because I don't throw things away) that will say this.

The next quote is from a boy who does not speak English very well. He only arrived in our program about four months ago, but he is full of energy and has made massive strides when it comes to language. He also did not seem to understand that this card was meant for my graduation, and wrote this:

"I love here but now is last day"

I am very much ok with the fact that this has nothing to do with me, because it will remind me that the kids really do love coming to after-school as much as I do. Even though it often seems like I am torturing them because I don't want them to roll their eyes or do want them to read the directions on their worksheet, that isn't what they remember. And it definitely won't be what I remember.

What I will remember are things like the time one student pulled a fake mustache out of his pocket and proceeded to wear it during snack time, or watching almost all of them completely fail at doing yoga, or when I taught them how to whistle using acorns. And this lovely card with these lovely quotes will help me remember those things.

Youthful Rebellion

2010-04-28T14:17:00.006-04:00

This week in New Jersey, students all over the state walked out of their classrooms. Schools throughout the state have been suffering major budget cuts and students decided they would no longer stand for it. After one student created a Facebook event for the walk out, 18,000 students joined the group. To get a full rundown of this event, read the NY Times article.

Once again, things colliding, me loving it. These students organized themselves using social media. They harnessed the power of the Internet to work for them, and took control when it comes to their education. Education is hugely important, and displays like this prove that this isn't just something that adults have decided on but that it is something students see as it is happening.

As I have said, I love this. Reading this story put a huge smile on my face, but as soon as I got to the one line that came from the statement the Governor's Office released in
response, I became infuriated. Beyond infuriated. Press Secretary Michael Drewniak said:

"It is also our firm hope that the students were motivated by youthful rebellion or spring fever"

He "hopes" it was just "youthful rebellion." That is the worst thing he could say. This statement dismisses the passion students have for their education as silly. It tells them that their opinions are unimportant and meaningless. "Hoping" that this was just "youthful rebellion" means "hoping" students aren't smart or well-educated enough to organize a useful protest. Students have realized their agency to make change, and immediately the government wants to cut them down.

I firmly hope that students involved in this protest realize the power of what they have done, and continue to make efforts to change their situation. Students have a unique perspective on the matter of their own education, and that perspective should be heard. Just as it was yesterday.

2010-04-23T12:00:00.003-04:00

For most of my college career, I have shocked my mother with my cleanliness. While I am by far not the neatest of people (I have too much stuff, where do you expect me to put it?!) I have done a relatively good job of not being a slob when left to my own devices (which, as a youth, was definitely not the case). Freshman year, I put everything in it place, and kept my bed made. Sophomore year, I lived with 2 other people in the same room, so it was tough but still relatively neat. Junior year I began to loosen up a bit, but still never let it get out of control.

This year has been a bit different. I have my own room, for the first time in my life, and I decorated it pretty pridefully. Unfortunately, this has allowed me to fall into a baaaaaaad pattern. What happens is, my room looks like this:
Then I allow it to get like this:
Then I organize it, and it looks like this again:
But then it quickly devolves into tornado zone again. Mostly this just perplexes me, because I like organization and I want to spend more time in my room when it is neat, but I still have little motivation to keep it clean.

I guess I just need to work on some maintenance strategies. And some having less stuff strategies.

Young Forever

2010-04-19T11:26:00.003-04:00

It is very possible that I made fun of this song when I first heard it. But now I love it. Talk about a power couple.

I Am Upset

2010-04-15T10:10:00.006-04:00

And let me tell you why. APPARENTLY, Eater NY decided that food trucks are over. The thing is, I wasn't around when they were still cool! For about one year, all sorts of cool people were makin cool food in cool lookin trucks and sellin it. But where was I? Not near any cool food trucks, let me tell you!

No one is better suited to buy food out of a truck than me. I like new and exciting food, I like things to be quick, I like to be outside (as long as I am in a city, not in nature), and I am afraid of walking into a restaurant and not understanding their rules and regulations. But now, I have missed it. I was at college. Cool food trucks are commercialized and ruined by capitalism. Just like everything else.

Regardless of whether they are still cool or not, I am going to the Food Truck Drive-In Movie under the Brooklyn Bridge this summer. Because that sounds awesome.

Environmental, Educational, and Really Really Cool

2010-04-09T11:35:00.003-04:00

In my perusing the internet today, I came across this cool project. It does many wonderful things at the same time, and you know how I love things that do many things at the same time. Yay efficiency!

PS 333 in Manhattan (where all the cool stuff happens. mostly.) is creating a rooftop greenhouse where students will learn about science in many realms (nutrition, environment, etc.) in addition to helping us make our cities more sustainable for supporting our luxurious consumer lifestyles.

I am very sure that I would like science a lot more at this stage in my life if I had a greenhouse on top of my elementary school. Just sayin.

I Have So Many Problems With This Trailer it is Ridiculous

2010-04-06T09:02:00.002-04:00

First, watch this:

Now I will list the problems:

1) This looks like two different movies. One is about Nate from Gossip Girl being in love with Julia Roberts' niece but not wanting to tell her he is a drug dealer. The other is about the crazy wild life of drugs and sex on the Upper East Side.

2) Both of these plots have been done before. Mostly on Gossip Girl.

3) The music and voice over lead me to say that I would believe it if someone told me this was a parody. But it isn't.

4) Do we really need another piece of media telling us that kids on the Upper East Side do lots of drugs and are pretty mean but we should still want to be them? I think not.

5) Oh look, 50 Cent is a drug dealer/prostitute do-er! Way to break down those barriers!

Crunch Time

2010-04-04T19:24:00.003-04:00

So. Easter is over now. My family's visit is over. I have a graduation dress. My taxes are mostly done. Only one thing left to do.

Blog? No. Bachelor's Essay? Yes. It is for real crunch time now. I have said it before, but I mean it this time. Charleston County is on Spring Break this week, which means I have about 12 extra hours in my week. All of which will be dedicated to hard work.

Hopefully.

No, they will. As soon as The House Bunny is over. And as soon as I clean my room. And as soon as I finish my taxes. But then I will work really hard. Wish me luck!

Seriously, I need it.

"Look at Diggy McCulkin over here" -Rev Run

2010-03-31T10:03:00.003-04:00

I realize everyone most likely does not care about this Diggy situation as much as I do, but I have to share this quote from his blog:

"ON MONDAY I JUST INKED A DEAL WITH ATLANTIC! WHICH HAPPENED TO BE A DAY AFTER MY BIRTHDAY. SO THATS PROBABLY LIKE MY FAVORITE BIRTHDAY PRESENT FROM MYSELF..."

This child seems to be under the impression that he is Kanye West. Also, this quote proves that he is 15. And, his Wikipedia page identifies him as a socialite. How can a 15 year old be a socialite? I do not understand!

Also, here is a video of Diggy and Bobbe J having a jerking contest. On a webshow. Which I though only actually existed on ICarly.

Night of 140 Tweets

2010-03-24T13:05:00.009-04:00

This is another example of lots of my favorite things colliding. The three things in this situation are Twitter, 140 comedians/writers/semi-celebs, and working to solve the troubles of the world. On March 12th, 140 tweeters took to the stage to perform one tweet each. Because otherwise that would be the longest comedy show you have ever seen.

Each comedian (well, they were mostly comedians) chose their favorite tweet to perform, which caused was a wide range of jokes resulting in reactions from "too soon" to "played out" to "hahaha." So it was funny.

I tried very hard to embed the trailer for this, but the code Funny or Die gave me kept being for "The Landlord" which was no good. Cause we have all seen that. 100 times. Three years ago. Anyway, here is a link to see the trailer.

What is most important is that all proceeds from this event go to an organization that is building school in Haiti. I think it is nice that a) some not-so-famous-and-powerful comedians were able to use the internet to get 140 people into a real live location and b) this took place even as the celebrity "Give to Haiti" mania is dying down.

The special is available on ITunes for $2.99 or on Amazon as a DVD ($10.99) or digital download ($2.99). I strongly recommend it.

I Am In Love With This Beat

2010-03-22T11:10:00.006-04:00

I saw this video on the TV about four times this morning. And I am in love with the beat.

The thing is, I don't think the verses ever really reach the epic-ness the beat implies.

Also Drake is nowhere to be seen, so that's a problem. To fix that issue, here is what is apparently a new track off Drake's album, "Shut It Down," featuring the Dream. A little bit slow, but any song with both of those voices works for me.

Also listen to "Over"

Look at little Diggy!

2010-03-11T22:44:00.001-05:00

My plan was to start this post off by saying that I had no further information about the video below. But then I googled Diggy Simmons. And found his blog. And found out that he has a new line coming out called Young Crafters. And that he is fourteen. And that he is inspired by people like Marc Jacobs, Kanye West, and Karl Lagerfeld. Whoooooo is this child?

Oh yeah, he is the child of hip hop pioneer Rev Run. And it totally makes sense that he is so crazy. And I of course mean crazy in a good way. Here is a music video he made. It is better than anything we ever heard from his brother JoJo.

Diggy - Made you look Freestyle (Flow Stoopid) from Diggy Simmons on Vimeo.

Diggy, I wish you all the success of Justin Beiber and beyond.

Great News!

2010-03-04T09:09:00.002-05:00

For certain people! (I am talking to you Leigh and Rachel). Sam Seaborn is going to be on Parks & Rec! Its true, the AV Club told me! This is a perfect combo of childhood-Maggie's-weird-obsession (do you know any other 6th grader who was into the West Wing?) and semi-adult-Maggie's-current-fave-tv-show!

Here is a fun video that the AV Club also gave me:

Bloopers are one of my fave things. I love knowing that the shows I have so much fun watching were also so much fun to make.

Photos

2010-02-27T14:42:00.004-05:00

It is on weekends like this that I wonder why I am so antsy to graduate.

And then I think about the homework I should be doing and I remember.

You Are Not Human If This Doesn't Make You Cry

2010-02-24T09:56:00.002-05:00

I'm just kidding, you could still be human. But I mean, it at least tugged a heart string right?

Watching The Life and Rhymes of Kanye West at 9 AM when I should probably be doing some homework has put thoughts in my head. Why can no one focus on the good things Kanye West does? He loves his mother, he had a good upbringing, he raps about God and the importance of family. How can we criticize a man like him SO MUCH, who makes videos like this...

...when I have had to explain to multiple children, ages 8 to 13, why they can't sing "She's Got A Donk" by Soulja Boy? Yet I hear no complaints about Soulja Boy, who makes such a big deal about being non-violent and creating simple, upbeat party music, while he has kids singing and and dancing to songs which tell them to do things like "Superman that hoe."

So, this is just me, once again, being confused about the priorities of the pop culture world. And me loving Kanye West.

Sorry For the Repeated Video Posting...

2010-02-22T19:06:00.002-05:00

...but how is it that this is the first time I have seen this video in the last six months?

Oh the things that were pop-culturally valued in 1991...

You Should Really Try This

2010-02-20T20:45:00.005-05:00

This is a plug for Swagger Juice. Except that it is really just a plug for you to watch this video. I honestly don't know how I came across it, but it is one of the most brilliant song parodies in centuries. These children have taken the well-crafted "Kiss U Thru The Phone" and turned it into an advertisement for the soda they created in chemistry class, "Swagger Juice."

I think the funniest part is comparing the lyrics of these 13-year-olds to the lyrics of actual Soulja Boy. Because they are 100% on the same level.

Someone Please Tell Me I Am Not Seeing What I Am Seeing

2010-02-19T12:09:00.002-05:00

Justin Bieber is a perfectly legitimate teen pop star. But lets not pretend he has any cred in the hip hop biz. So, SURPRISE CELEBRITY GUEST IN THIS VIDEO, why are you pretending he does? Luda already did a song with Jesse McCartney so...its not him I am talking about. Go to the 1:14 mark and the 2:02 mark. You will see who I am referring to.

Brilliant. Resilient.

2010-02-17T11:40:00.006-05:00

This post is going to be a rant. Just so you know. And MTV, it is aimed at you.

I also want to be clear about the fact that I think that censorship is fine. I am all for keeping objectionable material out of the hands of children.

But here is the problem. The way that most things are censored is completely irrational. In most situations, language is censored all over the place, while images of violence and sex are just all over the place.

MTV has censored words for reasons that even I don't understand. The word Dillinger was censored in Jay-Z's "Run This Town" because it is apparently a reference to a gun. Drake was censored for saying that his condo is the "crack" spot, but it is totally fine that there are chicks running around with ridiculously tight and low-cut basketball outfits.

The radio is definitely worse. I am aware. In Keri Hilson's "Knock You Down," the ship part of the phrase "Pimp ship" is bleeped. Please someone tell me why. The word ask is bleeped because the you can't really hear the k. Trey Songz' "I Invented Sex" becomes "I Invented SSSSS" because people are dumb and don't know what is happening to you when she "pulls back the sheets...climbs on top of me."

But here is my major, makes me want to yell and scream, problem. THIS is shown on MTV. Constantly.

Rihanna - New Music - More Music Videos

There are countless problems with this video, even with me staying away from the fact that Rihanna is a very public victim of violence yet has still decided that combining sex and violence is a great idea.

Rihanna is practically naked for most of this video, except for the bullets she is wrapped in and the military helmet on her head. She is laying on top of a tank. She is walking through the dessert as shots are being fired. Instead of portraying herself as strong, which the words of the song suggest she is trying to do, she is making violence sexy.

So, basically, I just want you to think a little bit about this MTV (and the rest of you). Is it really important that we keep the public from hearing words which are references to things they most likely do not understand but OK that Rihanna is dancing around with tape over her nipples and ammo around her shoulders? Its not. In case you couldn't figure that out.

So. Many. Baked. Goods.

2010-02-13T10:23:00.006-05:00

I love holidays. And I love baking. So for this one (Valentine's Day) I have baked many different treats. Some made their way to NY for a friend, but most were consumed in this household.
I took my inspiration/recipes from all around. These cake balls, filled with red velvet cake and covered in chocolate, came from Bakerella . They turned out quite well, but not perfectly. I am not sure exactly what I did wrong, but I think that way to much frosting made for poor construction.

The next thing I made were pink and white cookies, a little Valentine's play on the real black and white cookies. These are very high on my "favorite things I have ever made" list, because hey turned out well and made me feel like a real baker. This recipe came from Baked (my absolute FAVORITE place ever) except that I made it pink instead of red. Mostly a food coloring conservation issue.

And lastly, I made some chocolate cupcakes (which were actually vegan...weird) with vanilla-rose buttercream (which was straight up not vegan). This recipe came from my new fave food blogger, Joy the Baker. These worked out very well for a few reasons. 1) Rose is the perfect ingredient for a Valentine's Day treat. 2) Vegan cupcakes taste like actual cupcakes and 3) The frosting actually came together. This buttercream was made using a very different method than my usual method, but came out with a very different yet wonderful texture. Very successful.

So this has been Valentine's Day baking with Maggie. Join us for the next holiday for many more themed goods. Presidents Day is Monday..."Don't Tell a Lie" Cherry Cheesecake anyone?

"No...This Is A Break Up Ring"

2010-02-11T10:13:00.003-05:00

I have a been waiting until it was timely to post this video. So here it is, Valentine's Break Up, a close look at what happens when you and your significant other are not exactly on the same page. Or even reading the same book.

Valentine's Break Up from Ben Schwartz on Vimeo.

Happy Valentine's Day!

I Gotta Feeling

2010-02-09T09:49:00.002-05:00

Hey NYTimes, I am glad you have given up completely on even attempting to not be biased in your reporting. Especially when it comes to important issues. Like the upcoming film Valentine's Day. Here is what the Arts section had to say about it today.

"Whether you dislike “Valentine’s Day,” the coming romantic comedy whose ensemble cast features roughly every third actor in Hollywood, or only begrudgingly accept it, you can expect to see more movies like it. Variety reported that New Line Cinema, the studio behind “Valentine’s Day,” is already preparing a sequel-cum-spinoff called — wait for it — “New Year’s Eve.” (Evidently Arbor Day and Administrative Professionals Day aren’t sufficiently exciting to sustain their own movies, and someone already had the foresight to claim Groundhog Day.) The new film is expected to retain much of the creative team behind “Valentine’s Day,” including its director, Garry Marshall, and its screenwriter, Katherine Fugate. Cast members would be culled from the 20-odd performers starring in “Valentine’s Day,” who include Jessica Alba, Julia Roberts, Bradley Cooper and Anne Hathaway, though no stars for “New Year’s Eve” have been officially named yet, with shooting to take place later this year in preparation for a 2011 release. No matter how you feel about it, “Valentine’s Day” is planned to open on Friday."

This literally assumes that no one will enjoy this movie. I am not saying I will (I WILL) but at least let the movie come out before you make merciless fun of it.

"You know who you look like?"

2010-02-08T23:11:00.002-05:00

It seems that every time worlds are colliding lately it involves the cast of Jersey Shore.

MTV Shows

And come on, as soon as she was like "You know who you look like?" you knew she was going for Robert Pattinson. Its totally true.

Goooooooo.....?

2010-02-07T22:51:00.003-05:00

Today was Super Bowl Sunday! Which is exciting! For some people who like sports! And me who likes shared events that you know the whole country is excited about!

So even though I do not like sports, I bullied a friend into having a Super Bowl Party which I am now taking all credit for. Even though I did not host it, cook the food, or watch the game. BUT I did make these brownies, themed (because I love a theme) for the Super Bowl with pretzels in them:

I am still working on my food blogger photo taking skills. A camera other than my phone might be helpful but oh well....

Also, whilst not watching the game, I watched the Disney masterpiece The Great Mouse Detective. This watching Disney movies while not watching other things is becoming a dangerous habit. But it is actually not dangerous. So a good time was had by all. Keep an eye out for more of me talking about themes and shared events in the next week. We have a holiday coming up...

Pop Culture Catch Up

2010-02-05T12:01:00.003-05:00

I am currently planning the most intense weekend of pop culture catch up ever. While I should be planning out my homework schedule, figuring out which assignments I will do on what days and at which times, I am instead figuring out what I will watch first and what I will bake whilst I am watching it. So, here is the plan as of now:

Catch up on TV from last night that I missed while I was out on the town. This includes: Community, Parks & Rec, The Office, 30 Rock, Important Things, and Bones. Whew.
Watch the entire fifth season of Weeds. This may seem ambitious, but its only like approximately 360 minutes of show. That's six hours, totally doable.
Paper Heart? I've heard negative things, but I feel that it is my Michael Cera-lovin duty to at least see for myself.
Zombieland. I've heard positive things. And a lot of them.
The Deep End. I realize this is ridiculous. I started watching because I have a very strong want for all VMars alums to succeed. But lets be real, who can pass up a ridiculous dramedy about first year lawyers? Not me.

And I think that's it. We will see how this goes. I promise I will work on my Bachelor's Essay too. At some point. Probably.

Ooh Dah Lally!

2010-02-03T12:46:00.003-05:00

While the rest of the country was watching Lost last night, my roomates and I decided to go in the opposite direction, choosing the simplicity of Disney's Robin Hood over complex story lines no one understands at this point. Bonus: it came with this little gem.

Phil? Phil Connors? I Thought That Was You!

2010-02-02T08:34:00.002-05:00

Groundhog Day meant a lot more to me when I lived in the north, where six more weeks of Winter would mean six more weeks of heck. But here in Charleston it just means six more weeks of sixty degree weather. I can deal with that.

In Wikiing Groundhog Day today, I found out two things. a) Groundhog day has potential connections to Candlemas day, and therefore this lovely poem.

As the light grows longer
The cold grows stronger
If Candlemas be fair and bright
Winter will have another flight
If Candlemas be cloud and snow
Winter will be gone and not come again
A farmer should on Candlemas day
Have half his corn and half his hay
On Candlemas day if thorns hang a drop
You can be sure of a good pea crop

and b) there is an As Told By Ginger episode where a Groundhog is prominently featured. I am not even sure it has anything to do with Groundhog Day, but if you want to know, check it out below.

I was also going to tell you to watch the movie Groundhog Day on Comedy Central's marathon, but apparently they don't care about this wonderful holiday this year. So instead, watch it at 6 o'clock on Bravo! Enjoy!

Nants ingonyama bagithi Baba

2010-01-28T23:58:00.005-05:00

I have been watching episodes of Modern Family very much out of order, and I just watched the Pilot. I am embarrassed about how loudly I laughed at this part, alone in my dark room.

PS- I recommend watching this show. It is absolutely ridiculous, and usually ends with a cheesy, happy, we all love each other moment.

She's Crafty

2010-01-27T23:54:00.008-05:00

I have very much been on a making things kick lately. This usually manifests itself in a baked good, but this weeks its been more about crocheting. The local yarn store, Knit, was having a big "we are getting rid of everything" sale, so I stopped by and picked up a few things. First I made a flower...

...using the very interesting and intriguing technique of hyperbolic crochet. The name drew me in, and the mathematics confused me. Apparently, crocheting is a very effective way of creating a model of hyperbolic equations or something, which happen to have something to do with coral reefs. I don't really understand (if you want to understand, here is a link), but I did think it would make a pretty flower. So I made one.

Then I did some craft blog surfing, and found out that it is pretty simple to make yarn out of old T-shirts. If there is anything I have a plethora of, it is old T-shirts. So I did a lot of cutting. And I mean A LOT. And I did all of the cutting with right handed scissors, meaning that my poor left thumb is still numb. But, in the end, I had a couple of balls of thick, green yarn, and a good inclination of what to do with it. I give you...my current pride and joy...the turtle pot holder!

I like making things out of other things, especially when those things are things I already have and do not have to purchase. So this was really fun, and satisfied my urge to make things for now. I suppose that means I can get back to reading about Advanced Interpersonal Communications....

Out of the Office

2010-01-27T13:13:00.010-05:00

We can accuse The Office of many things. Like being not as fun as it used to. Or falling off quite a bit as of late. Or having a clip episode (seriously, what is this? The Fresh Prince of Bel Air?). Maybe even of being filler between Parks & Rec and 30 Rock. But one thing we cannot accuse it of it under-developing its characters. Since the second season, this has been what endeared me and most other people to the show, and I am here to share with you some prime, off-episode examples.

1) Subtle Sexuality.

If you haven't seen this you should be watching it right now. Kelly is definitely my favorite character, and this new Erin is also wonderful. This vid is beyond hilarious, but is never mentioned on the show. Interesting...

2) Ryan's Photography Blog

By all accounts, Ryan should no longer be a part of this show. He has screwed up in many ways, but it is so worth keeping him around if we get to hear what he thinks a photo of two cats in a basket represents. If you are wondering, it is an indictment on our society.

3) Erin, Kelly, and Ryan all have regularly updated Twitters, which include sassy @s to each other and in character commentary on popular culture.

Honestly, I feel extreme guilt for how much I don't want to watch The Office sometimes. But also honestly, these out-of-episode bits make me very glad the show is still on the air.

Who's House?

2010-01-22T11:08:00.005-05:00

From time to time, I get the extreme urge to run a marathon. This is not logical in any way, because for as long as I can remember, I have hated/been really bad at running. I ran on the Police Athletic League track team in sixth grade, and consistently won 5th and 6th place ribbons. In heats of 5 or 6 people. That was when I decided swimming would be my sport.

But now, every once in a while, something tells me I should totally run a marathon. I mean, I really like accomplishments. I love setting a goal and then meeting it, even if it is for something ridiculous, like baking every recipe in a book (Julie&Julia style), or crocheting a blanket (COMPLETED, age 12), or successfully reaching a destination at the time I predicted I would reach it. A marathon would be a super goal. Can you imagine? 26.2 miles? That's a lot.

A number of different things have inspired me to want to run a marathon. Once, I read an article about a man who promised his Dad he would run a marathon together, because it was something his Dad loved, and even though he didn't really like running he did it anyway. That totally made me want to do it. The episode of How I Met Your Mother where Barney runs a marathon without training, but then he can't use his legs makes me want to do it. Right now, my BFF Jackie is planning to run a half marathon, and her constant training makes it seem very possible. But I think that the real reason this urge is surfacing now has something to do with the fact that it would be a goal I am completely in control of.

I am still very excited for my future and all the goals I have for it, but there are so many variables. What jobs will be open, what jobs will want me, what jobs I will want. This is all very uncertain. In order to achieve the goal of running a marathon, all I would have to do is start running. Which is a good feeling. Even if the literal feeling of running makes me want to throw up.

MLK Day!

2010-01-18T21:30:00.007-05:00

Today was MLK day which means it was a day to remember the courageous work of Martin Luther King Jr. Oh yeah, and also it means we didn't have school, which is AWESOME. We took this day to take a day trip to Savannah, which is a bit over two hours south of Charleston.

Last year when we took this same trip, it was a pilgrimage to visit Paula Deen's restaurant, the Lady & Sons. This year, it was more about a fun getaway before the real work of this final semester sets in. It is a day like today when I really appreciate my choice to go south for college. The fact that we had a beautiful, sunny, seventy degree day in January continues to blow my mind, even four years later. We roamed the city, ate at a brewery, and enjoyed the many beautiful parks in the city.

Of course my Flip Video was along for the ride. Here is a lovely video of our goofy antics throughout the day!

PS- I love technology. We returned less than an hour ago and this video is already made and on the Internet.

Updated PS- Technology is eh. The video stopped working so here is a link to the vid on facebook.

"I'm the damn fool that shot him"

2010-01-16T10:44:00.003-05:00

I first saw this video about two months ago, and loved it then. At this point, I have probably seen in about 10 times, because every time Alexander Hamilton comes up in conversation (which is surprisingly often) I feel an overwhelming need to show it.

You're Welcome.

Changes in Latitudes

2010-01-13T21:42:00.007-05:00

Don't worry, this post is not about Jimmy Buffett. It is instead about changes in attitudes. I have avoided blogging about this, but I suppose I should mention the fact that this is my last semester of college. For me, stating that fact aloud is usually followed by an outpouring of fears and anxieties (which for the last few weeks was extremely annoying to my mother). I have a lot of questions like what am I going to do with my life? How will I pay for health care? Will I have long-term happiness? What will I do with my car if I move into the city?

Today, I decided, NO MORE. I am young. I have marketable skills. My interests are extremely well rounded. I know stuff about the Internet. I can have a positive attitude if I want to! Now, I am looking forward to the future! I am going to be a young urban professional. I will be involved in cultural events. I will be creative and fun and exciting. Nope, not worried.

And I am never watching Cougar Town again.

Seriously, I don't recommend it.

This is me being bright-eyed and excited about my life.

2010-01-10T23:12:00.006-05:00

Over this break, I watched a lot of The Nanny, the 90s television situational comedy about a wealthy Broadway producer and his Jewish nanny from Queens. As you may know, this show is ridiculous. As you also may know, this show was a HUGE hit. This means it reeled in some serious guest stars, which is very amusing in hindsight. Here is a list.

1. Twiggy

2. Andy Dick

3. Cloris Leachman

4. Roger Clinton

5. Ray Romano

6. Michael Bolton

7. Bob Barker

8. Shari Lewis

9. Billy Ray Cyrus

10. Alex Trebek

11. Hillary Clinton

12. Elizabeth Taylor

13. Rosie O'Donnell

14. Jon Stewart

15. Jason Alexander

16. Ray Charles

17. Elton John

18. Chevy Chase

19. Coolio
20. Bill Clinton

BE AWARE. This is an abridged list. There are many more.

2010-01-08T21:30:00.003-05:00

"Well, the girls all have windsuits so..."

ohmygoodness.

2010-01-06T14:16:00.002-05:00

This is one of the best photographs I have ever seen. Talk about worlds colliding.

And then my head exploding.

Utopia!

2010-01-06T00:10:00.002-05:00

This post may be a little bit exaggerated because I am really excited, but here goes anyway.

Tonight I went to a free comedy show. This is something that I do fairly often, and enjoy extremely often. The difference was that this time, it was at a wonderful bookstore that combined three of my faaaavorite things 1) popular culture (a bunch of characters from CollegeHumor.com were featured at the show), 2) cafe (with baked goods of course) and 3) saving the world!

To speak to that second point, the show was held at Housing Works, a really cool bookstore/cafe where all the books are donated, the staff is made up of volunteers, and every single cent of profit goes to the causes of homelessness and AIDS. This place is a brilliant way to take something that people do all the time (drink coffee/read books) and make it work for a cause. Add to that some free entertainment and it is perfect.

This was only my first visit to the cafe, but I really fell in love. This is partly a result of the wonderful show I saw, but it is also a result of my current wandering for a purpose in life. I have about 1 million different hobbies that I would love to turn into a career, and the Housing Works Bookstore and Cafe has combined three of them. So, visit the Housing Works next time you are in NYC, and look out for my future education nonprofit/bakery/event space...alliterative name in the works. (Eclairs for Education? Cookies for Kids? Don't worry I'm still working.)

2010-01-03T10:26:00.002-05:00

Step 3 in E-How's "How to Break into Comedy Writing" article:

"3. Know a good joke when you hear one. If comedians are the cars, then jokes are the gas."

This statement does not exactly make me believe that THEY know what a good joke is.

My Family

2010-01-02T00:09:00.008-05:00

So one of the best parts of being home for break is seeing my family. This particular break, one of the best parts has been allowing my family to use my new webcam and its fun effects. These are the results.

My mother...

My cousin...

My brother. Notice he needs no effects to make this face.

My sister. Here she is Justin Guarini meets mad hatter.

Lists!

2009-12-29T20:55:00.005-05:00

Just like everyone else this time of year/decade, I have been reading a lot of lists lately. These lists are of everything from the top grossing movies of the decade to the top weirdest promotional items the A.V. Club has received. I have decided to make my own list, compiled of the most interesting facts from some of the lists I have read.

1. Seven out of the ten highest rated television shows of the decade were different seasons of American idol. SEVEN OUT OF TEN. That means that America pretty much only likes American idol, and only watches other shows when it has to. And btdubs, two of the remaining three shows were Survivor. SURVIVOR. I really don't like reality television.

2. The song "Yeah!" by Usher, feat. Lil Jon and Ludacris was the most played song of the decade according to Nielsen (and they are pretty reputable). This is a fine song, and I have heard it about one million times, so this one seems about right.

3. Four of the top ten highest grossing films of the 2000s were of the Harry Potter variety. Boy America, when you like something, you really stick with it.

4. According to Billboard, Lil Wayne's "Lollipop" was the most popular ring tone of the decade. Also on the list, Flo Rida's "Low," T.I.'s "Whatever you Like" and the Shop Boyz' "Party Like a Rockstar." Interesting...

5. Last but not least, the Internet. Webby's (an Internet awards organization) put out a very enlightening list of the top ten Internet moments of the decade. This list, including things like Craigslist, the IPhone, Facebook, and Youtube, really shows that this decade has changed society. These Internet moments are much more than moments, as each one is now a large part of our everyday lives.

So that is my list! Looking back on the decade in list form might not be the most descriptive way to do it, but it is definitely a fun way to do it.

PS- I realize this is not a list about the decade, but this is a fun mash up of the top 25 songs of 2009, and it is really amusing to listen to.

See more funny videos and funny pictures at CollegeHumor.

Merry Christmas!

2009-12-25T00:01:00.003-05:00

Merry Christmas to one and all! I wish I had an old one of these to show you, as this is something my family once did every year. And that includes about five years after the point that it became embarrassing. But here is the modern version...happy holidays!

Snow!

2009-12-20T18:31:00.004-05:00

The way I choose what to worry about and what not to worry about is inexplicable. For example, things I am worried about: Vacations, the Future, Birds. Things I am not worried about: disease, driving, weather. It is that last one that got me into trouble this weekend.

Apparently, snow is a big deal around here. Yesterday I spent the day with my sister, brother, cousins, and my sister's international friends showing them the sights of NYC. This is among my favorite things to do, especially at Christmas time, so it was awesome to go to the library, see the tree at Rockerfeller plaza, go to St. Pats, and have our picture taken with Santa Clause. But then we had to go home. This took forevs. A trip that usually takes one hour took almost three, with one hour of that being outdoors in the snow. We got stuck in Jamaica, and spent a lot of time fretting about how we were going to get home. By the time we did get home, I had to spend the night at my Aunt's house (about 5 miles from mine) because the weather was so treacherous. I felt very cranky as a result of all this, and began to regret my lack of worry over weather.

Then, I woke up and turned on the news. The train that we came pretty close to getting on had been stuck between two stations from 2 AM to 8 AM. That is SIX hours. Talk about Christmas miracles!

Moral of the story? Add snow to my list of things to worry about.

2009-12-14T11:03:00.005-05:00

I know I previously addressed some of the ridiculousness that can be the NY Times, but this morning, I opened up the arts section to one particularly hysterical paragraph. Justin Bieber (teen pop sensation, age 14) performed last night at Z100's (local NY radio station) Jingle Ball, and THIS is what they had to say about it. (The link is there if you are inclined to read the whole article).

"Destruction, thy name is Bieber. Not frailty of voice nor cast on leg nor uncomfortably tall duet partners could keep Justin Bieber, the pint-size, swoosh-haired 15-year-old pop moppet from Stratford, Ontario — that’s Canada, people — from his appointed duty at Madison Square Garden on Friday night: decimating the larynxes of thousands of tween girls."

For a "serious" newspaper, its nice to see something not so serious. But how else are you supposed to cover a star whose manager was arrested for failure to tweet?

Made by Elves

2009-12-12T19:46:00.003-05:00

This Target commercial perfectly addresses one of my childhood issues with Santa Claus. I was always told that Santa made the toys in his workshop, but when they arrived on Christmas, they were in the same form and the same packaging as I had seen in Toys-R-Us, or the Macy's catalog. So, how could Santa possibly have made these toys? As a child who was much too logical, I decided that would not believe in Santa unless he brought me something that was made in his workshop. Then I would know that he was real, and that he had made something special for me. I also decided that I would know it was from Santa's shop if it was made of wood.

In hind sight, I realize that this must have been extremely irratating for my parents. Now, if they wanted to keep the dream alive, they had to find a present that was made of wood, which is really a ridiculous request. Never the less, when I woke up on Christmas, and found a checkers set, made of wood, with small teddy bear and heart shaped pieces, I KNEW that Santa was for real. And I treasured it. Now you may think, oh what a silly child, to want something made of wood for Christmas, this must have just been a phase...but no. This went on for years. At least three, as I recall.

2009-12-11T12:34:00.003-05:00

Lately, I have been feeling a serious resurgence of love for 808's and Heartbreak. So raw. So emotional. Specifically, "Welcome to Heartbreak" feat. Kid Cudi.

The video for this song is BEYOND great (partially because of Ye's sweater) as you can see from the still above, and it is definitely worth a view.

2009-12-07T11:30:00.005-05:00

Christmas is coming and the goose is getting fat!

WARNING: It is extremely likely that all posts from here till Christmas, will be about Christmas.

I would like to take a few minutes to talk about the plethora of Christmas movies that are out there. New movies get made every year, and those movie makers are always putting new spins on the classics, leading to some ridiculous films. Here are some fun synopses:

The Angel of Pennsylvania Avenue: Three depression era kids ask President Hoover to release their unjustly jailed father for Christmas.

A Smoky Mountain Christmas: A country-music star finds herself stranded in the Tennessee backwoods with seven orphaned children and a mountaineer.

The Note: After a tragic plane crash, a local journalist discovers a note that she believes was written by one of the passengers. She seeks the note's intended receiver, but the journey is more revealing of her own past.

I Want A Hippopotamus For Christmas: All Jack wants this holiday season is a hippopotamus, and when his wish is finally granted, laugh-out-loud hilarity ensues as his family learns to deal with the struggles of owning this unusual pet.

Holiday in Handcuffs: A story about a modern young woman who has a breakdown at Christmas and desperately kidnaps a handsome young guy to take home to her parents.

The Note II: Taking a Chance on Love: An advice columnist finds that dispensing words of wisdom and accepting them are two very different things.

The Night They Saved Christmas: A family tries to save Santa and his North Pole toy factory from dynamiting oil prospectors.

Single Santa Seeks Mrs. Claus: Nick's plan to let fate bring his wife to him must be changed as he must marry before taking over for his father as Santa Claus on December 26th.

Silent Night: An injured American platoon find themselves in a small German cabin sharing the spirit of the Christmas with their presumed enemies.

Unaccompanied Minors: After a Christmas Eve blizzard shuts down the airport, stranded youths create holiday pandemonium for an uptight airport official and his assistant.

First Ever Reader Challenge: Guess which one of these is not an actual holiday film. (No Googling. Pure Guesses)

UPDATE: Want the answer? I have buried it in my blog archive. Look in the October posts, at the bottom of my Jake and Amir post. All will be revealed to you!

2009-12-02T10:46:00.003-05:00

Look at what I made at work!

I have the best job ever....

2009-11-20T16:55:00.004-05:00

EVERYONE should watch this audio slide show about jerking. It is my new fave thing, and these boys are ADORABLE.

Ahh! Animals!

2009-11-20T14:02:00.004-05:00

This morning I got up at 5:54 a.m. to close the window because I heard a bird outside. Now despite what you may think, it was not because the bird was annoying me, but instead it was because I was filled with terror thinking that the bird would fly into my room. So I think its a good time to talk about my fear of animals.

This fear is very real, very overwhelming, and very inconvenient. I have a hard time going to the homes of anyone with a pet. I must cross the street at odd intervals to avoid dogs walking towards me. I've embarrassed myself many times ducking from low flying birds. I can't cat sit.

It is also hard to explain. I have spent a lot of time thinking about this fear, trying to understand its roots in an attempt to overcome it. It hasn't worked.

I've looked at my childhood. Aside from a goldfish here and there, I never really had a pet. My mom had a similarly well pronounced fear, but hers was much more specifically a fear of rodents. There were pets all around the neighborhood, but I tended to avoid interaction. I did witness my brother being bit in the face by my grandparents' dog, but I'm pretty sure that had little to no effect on me. When I was in high school, my neighbors' dog ran into me and knocked me over, but the fear was already well solidified at that point.

I've thought that maybe it has something to do with their unpredictability. Cats are so pouncey, and they have such sharp claws. Dogs bite, and the tiniest things can get them riled up. Birds can fly, which means they can go anywhere and do anything. Mice, gerbils, snakes, bugs. Who knows what any of them will do. But in the end, this theory doesn't hold. I love children, and children are nothing if not unpredictable. I have been jumped on by countless children, kicked in the face during a particularly wild hand stand, bitten when something wasn't going his way, and tripped by "accident." These unpredictable events have not kept me away from kids, so the unpredictability of animals is not likely to be the issue.

At this point, I have pretty much come to terms with this fear, and try to look at the positives. Houses without animals are usually much cleaner smelling, and cleaner in general. Without a pet, there are no feeding, cleaning, or walking responsibilities. My close friends know about this fear, so I am never asked to watch animals (except for one time...yeah it was two years ago, but I still complain).

So, world, I know that my fear is irrational. I know that most people don't understand. I know people think that I am cold hearted and uncaring. Luckily, I have allergies. The perfect excuse for sticky situations.

2009-11-18T10:14:00.004-05:00

Posts have been much too wordy as of late. Here I will just say that I am SO EXCITED FOR THANKSGIVING because we get to eat BEAUTIFUL food like this.

Lets be real, my Thanksgiving feast will look nothing like this...but I can dream can't I?

2009-11-15T10:55:00.003-05:00

I have a thing for non-fiction. I can't remember the last time I read a novel for pleasure, and at least the last five books I read have been memoirs or historical accounts. Usually, this love for the non-fiction translates to documentaries, but sometimes, like last night, it really doesn't.

There are documentaries that I love. Wordplay was my favorite movie for a while. The way that the movie showed you the every day lives of the competitors, and then all of a sudden showed them in their tight knit crossoword competition setting was very interesting. For these people, the tournament was as much about reunion as it was about competition, and by the end you really cared what the outcome was for each of the competitors. I recently saw The September Issue and came to see that while high fashion may seem above and beyond everyday life, the same kind of office politics and work frustrations are involved. These are the kinds of documentaries I like. The kind that tell you about something you didn't know much about, and help you to understand why others have such an interest in these things.

What I don't like is documentaries with a political agenda. I like politics, and I like it when people have opinions about things, but for some reason every documentary I have seen about a political issue enrages me. The first example of this feeling came when I watched Bowling for Columbine in my AP US History class. I believe in gun control. I believe that Columbine was a tragedy. I do not believe that big stunts are the way to solve these problems. Chasing down Charlton Heston outside his home and interrogating Wal-Mart employees are tactics that will do nothing but make those who disagree with you hate you more. These same angry feelings came up when I saw the new documentary Tapped last night.

Tapped is a new doc about the bottled water industry, and how it is ruining the world. I understand that there are environmental issues that are added to by bottled water consumption. I understand that there are consequences to our consumption of bottled water that we do not see everyday. This movie included good arguments, like the fact that the plants that create plastic bottles are detrimental to the communities surrounding them, or that the regulation of what goes into bottled water is extremely limited.

The problem is that these arguments were hidden among ridiculous, extreme techniques used to persuade people who are afraid of big words. The names of five or six chemicals that were found in bottled water were thrown out with no explanation of what they were or the effects they might have. Quotes were strewn across the screen to show that bottled water had been proven unsafe in the past, but they were all brief and used only to incite fear. Other techniques were used to make simple, everyday things seem like huge problems. All of the people drinking bottled water in a food court didn't know where the water had come from. I wonder if those same people know where the water from their tap comes from. I sure don't. Communities that are struggling because of water bottling plants were shown by a slow pan of a neighborhood block with very dark, dramatic music in the background. Take away the score and the slow motion, and it looks just like the scene I see every day when driving down the streets of my neighborhood.

These political documentaries are meant to inspire change, and persuade us into thinking or acting differently. They tell us what we are doing wrong, what the government is doing wrong, and what corporations are doing wrong, but they are all so extreme. The images and techniques these documentaries use give the impression that the producers think consumers will believe anything they see or here. These are usually the same assumptions the people the docs are railing against are operating under. Why not try something new? Why not treat the public like an intelligent body and give them useful facts instead of extreme examples? In the long run, documentaries like this will only cause more division and more frustration on these issues. Especially in me.

2009-11-09T23:24:00.002-05:00

Watching Gossip Girl tonight made me feel old. It was not because the plots lines are repetitive and over done, within the genre and within the show itself. It wasn't because the drama is about trivial subjects like high school hierarchy a superficial on again off again friendship. I'm used to that. This old feeling came from the fact that I just didn't really care.

I used to care a lot about these kinds of TV shows. And a lot is an understatement. The OC turned my world upside down. It caused a shift in the kinds of boys I liked, the kind of music I listened to, and the clothes I wore. It convinced me that my life would be a complete failure if I did not move to California. My Gilmore Girls obession was out of control. I literally remember sitting in art class on a Thursday afternoon and thinking that I was going to have to suffer through five whole days before I would get to see what happened next in the relationship of Rory and Jess. I even watched One Tree Hill, despite my hatred of Chad Michael Murray, and was emotionally invested enough to scream and yell at the television when two tenth grade (10th Grade!) characters got married. Laguna Beach was a whole different story. Because it was real. Somewhere deep inside, I was convinced that if Stephen and I ever crossed paths, he would be as smitten with me as I was with him.

So sure, I was surprised tonight that the much discussed threesome was between Vanessa, Dan and Olivia (who didn't think that "threesome" had Chuck and Blair written all over it?). I was happy to see that Blair and Serena were friends once again. I was mad at Jenny for the way she treated Eric. But it wasn't the same. I have no urge to go out and buy the clothes they were wearing. I literally said out loud "this music reminds me of high school" in reference to the show's soundtrack. I am mad at the show for the lost opportunity in the Serena-is-in-lust-with-a-Congressman-and-he-feels-the-same-way storyline.

In the end, I am unsure about how I feel about this shift. I know I am maturing and blahblah whatevs, but it just feels so strangely different. I no longer have that ability to blindly get involved with the lives of fictional characters. I don't just look at a lifestyle and wish that I could somehow fall into that world. I also didn't realize until I typed that out that this change in my television enjoyment is obviously and objectively positive, because what it really means is that my own life is not worth leaving for the life of another. And I would say that is pretty much a good thing.